I first met Bebe almost three years ago. After advertising at my church for my in-home care services, her daughter had taken Bebe my card. Sitting in her living room I saw a petite soft-spoken lady looking much younger than her years. She explained what she needed on a daily basis but the job was only to be as a fill in for her other helper while she was on vacation. Well, OK I thought, I can do that.
I didn't hear back from Bebe for a few months but when she finally called I was anticipating just working for a few days. But at the end of my first day she asked me when I could come back. I inquired if it would only be one more time and she said no, it would be permanent. I was overjoyed!
We got into a familiar routine twice a week; trips to the hairdresser, grocery store, doctor appointments, and fabric stores.
But monthly she talked, about many things. For a long time I felt guilty that my day was spent sitting instead of working?. But then I realized that I was doing what she needed and I began to relax and enjoy my work?.
I heard great stories about her and her husband's (lovingly called L.A.D.) many trips with family and friends, which included square dancing, bird watching, and visits to destinations rich in history. Many stories were from her youth, including the antics of her brothers and sisters. And I laughed at the time when she and her husband raised baby crows, which terrorized the neighborhood looking for shiny objects to steal.
The things she spoke most of were her bird-watching adventures. She had a great window seat at her table where many birds came to visit. The past few years she has seen wild birds diminishing and local sparrows taking over. Dumb brown birds, she called them.
One sparrow she talked about fondly was a fox sparrow, she named Foxy. This particular bird was off its beaten path for the 17 years it came to visit every winter. Although a member of Audubon, she didn't want to advertise the presence of this bird too much as it would bring a lot of unwanted traffic that may scare Foxy off. This bird was spotted and photographed by a local Audubon member so she and he knew that she had the real deal right in her back yard.
At the end of winter last year she felt that Foxy had been taken by one of the hawks that also frequented the neighborhood. Before that though, I had happened to take one of the last pictures of him. After she felt that he was truly gone I framed that picture and gave it to her for her birthday. I saw the tears in her eyes and knew we had connected.
Occasionally in the past Foxy had traveled with another fox sparrow and Bebe had hoped that this other one would come back this past winter. We both watched as the weather became cooler. One day he appeared in late fall. She was so excited that she would have another fox sparrow visiting for many years to come. This one she named Smudge as the dark spot on his chest was slightly smudged as if someone has smeared a freshly painted spot.
Now, I am the opposite of a professional birder. I throw out bread on the lawn; no elaborate feeding station for me. But this winter I went a little further and threw some seed out on a covered patio. It was a rough winter and even the dumb brown birds needed food.
One morning I was up early and looked out and saw a solitary bird, darker in color, larger, stripes on its chest, with that unmistakable dark spot where the stripes meet.
No way, I thought. It can't be; a fox sparrow visiting a non-birder, eating my meager offerings from my patio floor? But yes it was, right there in front of me. I grabbed my camera and took the best picture I could. I looked for him again in the evening, as is their trait, to come in early and late in the day. He came back! I took more pictures. I needed proof before I took my speculations to Bebe. I brought my camera to her house and could hardly contain my excitement as I explained what I saw. I put the camera in front of her and as I zoomed in on the bird in the dark background I saw her face begin to light up.
You got one! She exclaimed.
The day was sparked with excited talk of this little bird. She seemed to think that possibly there was more than one fox sparrow visiting our area, which was a good sign for the species. But personally I liked to think that we were sharing the same bird and that he followed me home because of our connection over him. I made two batches of suet this past winter to make sure our fox had plenty to eat. All winter long we talked about our mutual visits and I saw him as often at her house as I did at mine. It was like we had a little secret between us.
My husband and daughter even got caught up in the excitement of our new friend. Every day they would ask ?Did you see the fox?? We took turns peeking out the window as not to disturb him. And my day felt complete if I had at least one sighting of him a day.
You just never know what kind of a connection you will find with a person and what joy that can bring both of you. I miss his visits now as spring is approaching and he left a few weeks ago.
But if I am lucky, next winter Bebe and I will be watching together for the return of Our Bird.
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